The moment, i died for.

Can the moments we live for, also be the moments we die for? If so, what would those moments be... ?




This is what helps me see everyday...

The idea of a moment is an interesting one, to say the least. It seems to involve thinking about what it is that you see as an individualized moment. An example most would seemingly give would be, seeing there child for the first time; seeing the love of their lives as that for the first time, the love of their life. But, what about the things as insignificant as was looking up to see a calming wind, or even listening to a song in front of a calming place. Those are moments that I have cherished since I realized I see things differently.


When i see something like this, this is a moment i keep close, because they are so unique they need to be captured.

I see things not as they are, but as I want to see them. In sense, letting these compartmentalized segments of time, something more then just something that can be passed up, but rather something more then the sum of its parts. From those parts, I choose to believe we have moments that allow us (me) to see things as beautiful as I want them, all the while seeing moments that do not actually exist is something I choose to believe is a necessity. Because, beauty is something that this world seems to have far too little of (no offense) and a little more of it seems be what is necessary.


Biology and natural make a moment, that i remember fondly...

The way that the light refracts off the sidewalk on a scorching summer day, creating a glimmering array of light that, only the twilight vampires could compare to. That is a moment of pure beauty that we take for granted. It would go unnoticed to those that seem to only see it as an annoyance to an otherwise ordinary walk down Queens Blvd. Yes, I am using real world examples, but unfortunately no, I will not be able to provide audiovisual guidance to see this beauty all the time. Yet, I digress, that is a moment in real time that cannot be described with anything by myself, but other then an anecdote about a terrible contrivances set up by Hollywood to swallow up the young minds of societies females—I can’t think but call it anything but a beautiful moment.

Really? Like Diamonds? All i see is the glimmering of pavement on a summer day.


The moment I realized I had truly, fucked up my life, is one of those moments that as much as I wanna say is beautiful, it isn’t but that’s what makes a moment so special, so unique. It is s point in actual space that makes sense to me, not because it was really a fucked up point in my life, but because I was the moment I realized that I could change, be something more, and maybe, if I try hard enough, achieve that which I seemed to covet so dearly without it being something unattainable.
And so, those are moments, about vision and clarity, tomorrow I hope to write about moments in musical awesome(ness) that I cant wait to ramble on about. Either way here are a few things to ponder over, while your trying to sort through this unedited piece of garbage.


Some music, to enjoy... its a litte personal, fuck you. Its a really good track.

Better then It looks...

What am I? It is a question I keep asking myself. I am left speechless in trying to discuss its ramifications, and what I might reveal about myself, to myself, in discussing it. I shall broach this topic today because I am on the brink of crying due to the things that this world is capable of doing. From the geo political situation of our society; to the ever dumb-ing down of what our society teaches its youth.
I, am currently watching a movie that is making me think about the decisions I’ve made in my life and how grateful I am that I have made some decision’s over others. For I may have done some revolting things over the years, which still to this day, cut deeper then any knife could. Yet it makes me think more and more about who I am, and what I’m capable of doing for society. I can change it for the better, give it something that it deserves, and give it a hope that I so want society to so desperately have. Yet alas it is something that I need to focus my life on, and my life has always been a mishmash of me being unable to motivate myself to do anything productive.
This isn’t a blog for me anymore, its something understand why I do the things I do. Mainly because I cant do it on my own. I don’t do it to understand myself better but to understand how I can be understood. Which seems like a anomaly in an of itself, because if someone else can understand me, then I have become a victim of a society that neglects itself enough that it can be understood more than it can be identified.
Again, this no longer a blog about me spitting my writing out for the sake of writing, cause I haven’t put a single game review up, but if you could only see my saved folder, and all the crap that I have in there. The simplest answer to the gaming question is that its really something near and dear to me and I can’t let it become something that I really get bored with.
On the musical tip I will probably be writing more about the songs that have made me feel something over the last 5 months, yes since the end of last semester. Why, because this summer was something special for me, not exactly sure what that special something was, but it gave me something to look forward to, in the coming future.
Song’s of the moment
“Countdown”- Phoenix, Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix
“Wolcott”- Vampire Weekend, Vampire Weekend
“In My Sleep”- Joe Budden, The Padded Room